I was barely sitting down when i heard a vioce from the other stall saying : "Hi, how are you?"
I'm not the type to start a conversation in the men's restroom But i don't know what got into me, so i answered, somewhat embarrassed, "Doin just fine!"
And the other guy says: "So what are you up to?"
What kind of quesion is that? At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so i say: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just travelling!"
At this point im just trying to get out as fast as i can when i hear i hear another question. "Can I come over?"
Ok, this question is just too weird for me but i figured i could just be polite and end the conversation. i tell him, "No....... I'm a little busy right now!!!"
Then i hear guy say nervously... .
Listen. i'll have to call you back. There's is an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!"
Upset Wife
She came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making Love to a very attractive young woman.
The wife was VERY upset!
"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to Me a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!"
And he replied: "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened.
"Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
And he began: "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young Lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and Defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the nchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower and while She was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I Threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair like them.."
He took a quick breath and continued: "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said "Please........do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'"
______________________________________________________________
What chair?
A philosophy professor walks in to give his style their final exam. Placing his chair on his desk, the professor instructs the style, "Using every applicable thing you've learned in this course, prove to me that this chair DOES NOT EXIST."
So, pencils are writing and erasers are erasing, students are preparing to embark on novels proving that this chair doesn't exist - except for one student. He spends thirty seconds writing his answer and, to the astonishment of his peers, turns his paper in.
Time goes by, and the day comes when all the students get their final grades...and to the amazement of the style, the student who wrote for thirty seconds gets the highest grade in the style.
His answer had simply been: "What chair?"
